Unusual Ways to make your Arrows Fly Faster

APRIL 1ST 2022

Question:

"My arrows are going at 170 FPS, but I want them to go at 170.422, which according to my calculations will beat the reaction time of a deer in the off season at a distance of 18.69 yards. Can I get the added speed by just concentrating harder with my left eye, or should I just close my left eye and stand closer while humming so I can get the added speed to my arrows?

Asking for a friend."

- Simon P. Freely

 

Answer:

Clearly you've thought long and hard on this topic. There are many ways to make your arrows go slightly faster.

First, you should consult your horoscope and whether Mercury is in retrograde. If the conditions are favourable, try to shoot from uphill to the deer so your arrows get a gravity assist and this should counteract any negative effects from the planet Mercury.

Secondly, remember to always wax and polish your arrows. Don't forget the fletching! A well greased arrow will travel through air faster thanks to lubrication.

Thirdly, if you could grow taller or get longer arms, you could add more power to your shot (and thus more speed). If you cannot do this, just invest in some high heeled boots that make you at least look taller to the deer.

Fourthly, get yourself a really expensive tree stand and place it at the very top of the highest tree you can find. The taller it is the more gravity will make your arrow go faster on the downward trajectory. Remember to only shoot at a sharp angle downwards. You will need to practice shooting at your feet ahead of time so you understand how to shoot almost straight down.

Fifthly, headwear is very important. Make yourself a hat out of aluminum foil or tin foil (aluminum is better however) and keep your archery equipment in a lead box when you're not shooting it. This will protect your equipment (and brain) from harmful radiations which could slow down your focus and the speed of your equipment.

Sixthly, bubblegum. You need to be shooting while you chew so that you get better at concentrating. Every time you chew bubblegum you need to practice shooting at things, and force yourself to concentrate on speed while you are chewing.

Seventhly, if you are still having problems buy a crossbow, abduct a mad German scientist like Jeorg Sprave, stick him in a well and force him to make the crossbow faster. Keep quoting lines from "Silence of the Lambs" until they make you a faster crossbow.

 

Eighghghghgthly, use an arrow that isn't so stiff. Your arrows should have the flexibility of overcooked spaghetti if you want them to go really fast. Or better yet, use actual spaghetti.

Ninethly, taper your fletching from back to front so that the fletching at the back is significantly shortly than the front fletching. I know this looks weird, but as the arrow goes over your arrowrest it will have increasingly less drag and therefore more speed.

Tenthly, run towards the deer while shooting, thus adding your running speed to the speed of your arrow. If you can run at 10 fps while shooting at 170 fps, your arrows should go 180 fps. Faster if you jump while shooting.

Eleventhly, draw the string back to your ear and hook it directly on your ear. This will provide more speed + power, but you will also train your ears to get stronger, which has the added effect of making you more attractive to women. As an extra bonus, this frees up your drawing hand to drink beer, learn crochet, etc.

Twelfthly, buy flash bangs. Stun the deer and then don't worry about speed. Or better yet, put the flash bangs on your arrows, and pull the pin right before shooting. This way you stun and kill the deer at the same time!

Thirteenthly, lean exactly 5 inches closer to the deer before shooting, thus making it feel like you are shooting downhill and making your arrow slightly closer even before you shoot, so it will reach the target faster while getting a gravity assist from shooting on a downward angle.

Fourteeeeenthly, remember to coat your fletching with beeswax and lick it before shooting to cut down on how much the wind effects your arrows.

Fifteently, shave a few extra grains off your arrows so they are slightly thinner. Or better yet, put them on a diet of string beans, celery sticks, and ice water before going hunting. If you starve them a little they will be lighter and therefore faster.

Sixteeenthly, hold in your farts and when you are ready to shoot release a really big one to give your arrows an added bit of wind so they go faster. The more wind you make, the faster the arrow goes.

Seventeeenthly, place your tree stand in alignment with the rotation of the earth so you get extra speed thanks to earth's rotational axis. Always shoot away from the sun so the sun's gravity doesn't accidentally effect the speed of your arrows.

Eightghteeenththly, learn how to channel your chi into your arrow to make it go faster. A good strong chi can overcome even a moderately windy day. Plus, as you get better at focusing your chi you can learn how to reach into the fourth dimension of time and slow down time so your arrow is infinitely faster than the deer. However, if you do learn this you will need to beware of interdimensional demons.

Nineteenthly, train European swallows to carry coconuts and when they're really strong, cut off their tail feathers and use that to make your fletching. Trim the fletching into the shape of a Lamborghini so it goes faster, and let it fly.

Twentiethly, just learn magic. Magic will solve all your problems. Stay away from dark magic however, that stuff will rot your soul and make your genitalia shrink.

Happy Shooting! April Fools!

Fix your Bicycle for Fun and Exercise (and Profit)

So bicycling is already an exercise, but so is fixing your bicycle. Or better yet, learn how to fix other people's bicycles and you can "exercise and get paid for it" on a regular basis.

Learning how to fix your own bicycle is certainly a good way to save money. Professional bicycle mechanics in Canada typically charge $60 per hour + the cost of parts.

See How much should a Canadian Bicycle Mechanic be charging for repairs?

So yes, you can definitely save money and get exercise while fixing bicycles.

But How Do You Learn How To Fix Bicycles?

Well, there are a number of methods of learning how to fix bicycles. Here is a list of ways:

1. Take a bicycle mechanic training course from a professional bicycle mechanic instructor. The one I recommend is Smokey from the Quadra Bicycle Mechanic School. Smokey used to teach the BAM class in Toronto, but later moved his teaching to the island of Quadra in British Columbia. Before I became a personal trainer / sports trainer, my one time goal was to open a bicycle shop and become a full time bicycle mechanic. Smokey is the guy who trained me, and even though I never opened my bicycle shop, I still credit him with me changing my life around and starting my own personal training business.
2. Learn from a book: The book I recommend is "Barnett's Bicycle Repair Manual". If you do a Google search you can probably find a PDF copy of it. Otherwise it usually costs about $29.99. I have a copy of the book that I got when I took the BAM program in 2009.
   
3. Learn from a website: Eg. The Bicycle Mechanic, for example, is a website I started in 2009 around the time I took the BAM program here in Toronto. I was basically learning everything I could during the BAM class from Smokey, plus the Barnett manual, and converting the things I learned into a website that other people could read and use.
4. Learn from various YouTube channels. There is no one YouTube channel I am going to recommend on this subject. Many of them are good. They range from celebrities like James May (from "The Grand Tour" and "Top Gear") doing bicycle builds and maintenance videos to people who are not famous, but are professional bicycle mechanics. I have included one such video from James May below in which he does some "boring bicycle maintenance".
5. DO ALL OF THE ABOVE. Watch the videos on YouTube, read websites like The Bicycle Mechanic, get a copy of Barnett's manual, or take a bicycle mechanic training course. If you're absolutely serious about getting really good at fixing bicycles then just do everything.
   

And once you learn how to fix bicycles then you can potentially earn money (and get more exercise) while doing an activity you enjoy. (Well, it isn't always enjoyable. Sometimes it is hard, but anything that require exercise during the process usually means there is a work element to it.)

What about myself?

Speaking for myself I learned how to fix bicycles from my dad and my best friend Jonathan (who was practically a brother to me) when we were growing up. When I was older and serious about learning more about how to fix bicycles I took the BAM course, I got the Barnett manual, I made the website myself, and I have even considered making my own bicycle mechanic YouTube videos. With the exception of the bicycle mechanic training course from Smokey I did everything else myself.

Same thing goes years ago when I got more serious about making my own bows. I took a course from a bowyer here in Toronto and I purchased 5 books on the subject of bow making, so now I can make my own flatbows, pyramid bows, longbows and more.

If you really want to learn something then hire someone to teach you. It is the whole premise of my sports training business. I teach archery, boxing, swimming and ice skating. Skills that people really need an instructor for if they want to learn how to do it properly.

What should you do with broken or damaged arrows?

Q

"What should you do with broken or damaged arrows?"

 

A

Well, there are a number of options you can use them for.

#1. You can repair them and use them again as arrows.

Possibly even keep using the same arrows for years and years if you get good at repairing them.

You could potentially even take a broken aluminum arrow that has a wider shaft, cut the shaft into smaller pieces, and use them to make footed shaft arrows out of your carbon fibre arrows, thus making them more durable (and more accurate at short distances).

#2. You can throw them out / recycle them.

I personally find this to be very wasteful, even though you are recycling them. They would have to be completely useless in my opinion to do this.

Also it should be noted that because carbon fibre arrows are made from carbon fibre, well, they're not really recyclable... So you should probably try to find a different use for them. Aluminum and wooden arrows however are certainly recyclable.

#3. Gardening! 

I know multiple people who use their old broken arrows for gardening. Why gardening?

Because a wide variety of plants often need a pole for them to climb on. Peas for example, as well various other varieties of plants. Broken arrows can also be used for labels so you know which plant is which (sometimes it gets confusing when they look similar), and there are other creative options for how to use your broken arrows in your garden.

#4. Crafting!

Some people are just really creative and can use long straight hollow rods for a variety of things. You can glue the arrows together to make sculptures, items for your home, decorations (xmas, halloween?), and other things.

#5. Reuse them for something else!

This is borderline crafting, but not necessarily. You might only need to trim the broken arrow shafts to a desired length and then you can use it for a variety of things.

Eg. While gardening is one example of reusing the arrows, you could also potentially use them for fishing by making a fishing pole out of broken arrows. It wouldn't be a very fancy fishing pole, but all you really need is a pole, fishing line, a hook and bait for it to catch a fish. (A little luck helps too.)

Winter is arguably the best time of year to be doing any kind of crafting project, but with spring coming gardening will soon be an option too!

Bow String Brace Height

Q

"What is the best brace height for my bow?" 

A

It depends on the type of bow and the manufacturer. You should check the manufacturer's guidelines for the best brace height. If you cannot find the manufacturer's guidelines for the ideal brace height then you may need to experiment a bit.

Once you have the manufacturer's recommended distance then you just measure the distance between the lowest point in the handle to the bowstring. If it is too low you need to tighten the string by twisting it about 5 to 10. If the bow string is too high then you need to untwist it 5 or 10 times and check again. Keep repeating this process until you reach the optimal distance.

I personally use the "rule of thumb" method for recurve bows, and slightly less than that for longbows and flatbows. I am less worried about being exactly precise because I know the optimal brace height is really often a range within 1 to 2 inches of the rule of thumb method.

The important things to keep in mind are the physics involved...

The Physics of Brace Height

Too Long Bow String = Too Low Brace Height = Bow string de-accelerates, causing slower arrows, more arrow vibration, more bow vibration, sluggish accuracy.

Perfect String Length = Optimum Brace Height = Bow string accelerates fully, causing nice fast arrows, reduced vibrations, optimal accuracy.

Too Short Bow String = Too High Brace Height = Bow string doesn't accelerate fully, causing slower arrows, vibrations are still reduced, accuracy is down because arrow speed is slower.

Optimal > Too High > Too Low.

Thus it is better to be slightly too high than slightly too low, but ideally you want to get as close to the Optimal Brace Height as you can.

So if you cannot find the manufacturer's recommended brace height then it is better to try the "rule of thumb method" and experiment a bit.

If your bow string is hitting you in the wrist during shots then your brace height is definitely too low.

What is the rule of thumb method?

Holding the bow sideways with the string away from you place your hand on the lowest point on the bow's handle in the "thumbs up" position towards the bowstring. If your thumb is touching the bow string then the brace height is too low and is likely to hit you in the wrist.

You then unstring the bow, twist the bow string 10 times to make it tighter, and restring the bow.

You check the brace height again using the rule of thumb method and if it is still touching your thumb then you repeat the process.

Because people have different sizes of hands the optimal brace height may be roughly 1 or 2 inches above your thumb.

Notes

With longbows and flatbows expect the optimal brace height to be slightly lower than what is normal for recurves, so closer to your thumb or even touching your thumb.

If a bow string is brand new expect it to stretch a bit during the first hour of being used. You may need to stop and adjust the bow string's brace height 30 to 45 minutes a second time.

Why I Love Blunt Field Points and Wingnuts

When it comes to archery finding a really good target to shoot at is really important.

However what you can safely shoot at (depending upon the distance and other factors) can really vary significantly based upon the type of arrowhead you are using.

The standard metal blunt arrowhead, like those sold by 3riversarchery.com, I would argue are the most useful and beneficial because you can add a wingnut or a washer behind the arrowhead and make it so digs into the grass or dirt like an anchor.

Using a metal blunt with a wingnut means you can use a target ball like the Rinehart target ball, shown below, which is extremely durable and if used with blunt arrowheads will last a really long time. (I currently have two of these target balls and use them regularly during my archery lessons because they're very versatile with respect to both field archery and target archery.)

If you don't have a target ball you don't necessarily need to use blunts however.

You can also add wingnuts to pointed field points (like in the image below), allowing you to shoot at anything you don't mind damaging. Eg. Plastic water bottles raised upright on a broken arrow I find makes a great target.

 There are also other types of blunt arrowheads, like those shown below which have sharp edges and are meant for small game hunting. Don't use those on a target ball, but combined with wingnuts they work great for shooting at plastic bottles and similar targets which you don't mind damaging.

With respect to rubber blunt arrowheads you don't want to use those on a rubber target ball either. For some reason rubber bouncing against rubber BOUNCES LIKE CRAZY!

So yes. Definitely don't use rubber blunts on a rubber ball.

Using the blunt field points and wingnuts in combination also works well for:

• Shooting in snow.
• Long distance shooting.
• Any time you are worried about possibly losing your arrow.

Do field points plus wingnuts still work? Yes, but then you need to use a target that you don't care if it gets damaged. So you don't get the versatility and durability of a target which is reliable when it comes to stopping your arrow. (When hitting a plastic bottle your arrow will often rip right through the plastic and the plastic can damage your fletches. By shooting at a rubber ball it STOPS the arrow and your fletching doesn't get damaged.

So really this is a matter of durability and longevity for your equipment.

Plus doing field archery shooting at a rubber ball is great practice for small game hunting and hunting in general. Also good practice if you want to enter a field archery competition.

Sign up for archery lessons in Toronto by emailing me at cardiotrek@gmail.com to learn more.